Provided by Kaplan

In this blog, we’ll explore a few more techniques that will come in handy when you’re communicating with colleagues, clients or superiors in a business environment and in everyday life.

Let’s start with some news that your boss or clients probably won’t want to hear:

- There will be a delay in the completion of the project.

The speaker has made no attempt here to soften the negative content of the message. A more diplomatic and polite version might look something like this:

- There might be a slight delay in the completion of the project.

We have added just two words to the sentence, but we have made it considerably more diplomatic. First, we have added the modal verb ‘might’, a technique we discussed in our previous post, and second, the qualifier ‘slight’.

1. Qualifiers

Qualifiers are words used to modify other words and they increase or decrease the quality signified by those words. Here’s a simple example:

- It is very hot.

Here the qualifier ‘very’ modifies the word ‘hot’ and increases its quality. If we use qualifiers to decrease the quality of a word, they make great ‘softeners’, words used to soften the tone of our content or convey politeness when we speak. Other examples of qualifiers that can make great softeners are:

a little, a bit, a little bit, slight, slightly, small, one or two.

Consider using these alternative structures when giving your boss or your clients some bad news:

- We are having problems with the new product.

- We are having one or two problems with the new product.

- We will run over budget.

- We might run slightly over budget.

- The marketing campaign is behind schedule.

- The marketing campaign is a little bit behind schedule.

2. Negative Question Forms

Another way we can make our English more diplomatic is by using negative questions when we want to make a suggestion. Consider this sentence:

- We should redesign the company logo!

This sounds quite forceful and direct and you’d probably want to avoid this when speaking to a superior or a client. A more indirect version looks like this:

- Shouldn’t we redesign the company logo?

Here we have taken a forceful sounding statement and turned it into an indirect suggestion by adding ‘not’ and changing the syntax to make it into a negative question. Typically, we use shouldn’t, wouldn’t and couldn’t to form this type of question.

- We must hire a new advertising agency.

- Couldn’t we hire a new advertising agency?

- Wouldn’t it be better to hire a new advertising agency?

3. Using the Past Continuous Tense

Another way to make a sentence less direct and more diplomatic is to use the past continuous tense:

- I hope we can sign the contract today.

- I was hoping that we could sign the contract today.

Using the past continuous makes the sentence sound more hypothetical and tentative, and therefore less direct and is a great technique for injecting diplomacy and politeness into your English. Here are a few more examples:

- I think we need to hire more employees.

- I was thinking we need to hire more employees.

- I aim to finish this project by the end of the month.

- I was aiming to finish this project by the end of the month.

4. The Passive Voice

Finally, the passive voice is a great way to make your sentences sound more diplomatic:

- You have broken my computer!

This active voice sentence is brutally direct and if your aim is to avoid confrontation then you might consider using the passive voice to lessen the emotional impact of the sentence:

- My computer has been broken!

Here we are removing the subject (you) from the sentence completely and focusing on the object (the computer) and the action. The effect here is to de-emphasize personal responsibility for the action. Let’s have a look at a few more examples of diplomatic sentences using the passive voice:

- You said you were going to sign the deal today.

- It was understood that you were going to sign the deal today.

- You agreed to lower your fees.

- It was agreed that you were going to lower your fees.

Now that you have plenty of useful polite expressions, vocabulary and grammatical structures at your disposal, it’s time to start being diplomatic in English!

About author: Jeremy Bentley is professional native English teacher and a Greek to English translator. You can meet him and learn with him here at our online English language school.

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Basic words 

father – somebody’s male parent

mother – somebody’s female parent

parent – somebody’s father or mother

son – somebody’s male child

daughter – somebody’s female child

husband – the man who a woman is married to

wife – the woman who a man is married to

spouse – somebody married to another person; husband or wife

brother – a boy or man who has the same parents as another person

sister – a girl or woman who has the same parents as another person

sibling – a brother or sister

elder brother/sister – a brother/sister who is older than you

younger brother/sister – brother/sister who is younger than you

grandfather – somebody’s parent’s father

grandmother – somebody’s parent’s mother

grandparent – somebody’s parent’s parent

great grandfather – a father of your grandparent

great grandmother – a mother of your grandparent

grandson – somebody’s son’s or daughter’s son

granddaughter – somebody’s son’s or daughter’s daughter

grandchild – somebody’s son’s or daughter’s child

uncle – somebody’s mother’s or father’s brother; your aunt’s husband

aunt – somebody’s mother’s or father’s sister; your uncle’s wife

nephew – somebody’s brother’s or sister’s son; your husband’s or wife’s brother’s or sister’s son

niece – somebody’s brother’s or sister’s daughter; your husband’s or wife’s brother’s or sister’s daughter

cousin – somebody’s parent’s brother’s or sister’s child; somebody’s aunt’s or uncle’s child

stepfather – your mother’s husband (not your real father)

stepmother – your father’s wife (not your real mother)

stepbrother – your stepfather’s or stepmother’s son (at least one of your parents is different)

stepsister – your stepfather’s or stepmother’s daughter (at least one of your parents is different)

stepson – your spouse’s son (from an earlier marriage)

stepdaughter – your spouse’s daughter (from an earlier marriage)

father-in-law – your spouse’s father

mother-in-law – your spouse’s mother

brother-in-law – your spouse’s brother

sister-in-law – your spouse’s sister

son-in-law – your daughter’s husband

daughter-in-law – your son’s wife

boyfriend – a boy or man that a girl or woman goes out with

girlfriend – a girl or woman that a boy or man goes out with

widow – a woman whose husband has died

widower – a man whose wife has died

bachelor – a man who has never been married

spinster – a woman who has never been married

single – a person who isn’t married and doesn’t have a boyfriend/girlfriend

12 Words and Phrases with Examples

1. baby – a very young child

- I always do some housework when the baby is sleeping in the afternoon.

2. infant – a baby or very young child, newborn child

- My sister is 14 years old, but sometimes she acts like an infant.

3. toddler – a young child who has just learnt to walk

- Toddlers can walk, but they don’t always talk yet.

4. marriage – legal relationship between a husband and wife

- She only has a stepdaughter from her husband’s first marriage, but she likes her as her own.

5. marry (sb), get married to sb – become somebody’s husband or wife

- My father was 29 and my mother was 25 when they got married.

6. go out (with sb) – spend time with somebody and have a romantic or sexual relationship with them

- My parents had been going out for two years before they got married.

- My mother doesn’t like that I go out with Tom; she says he’s too old for me.

7. get engaged – agree to marry somebody

- Imagine, my sister has just got engaged to a footballer, they’re planning to get married in the summer.

8. wedding – the act of marrying, a marriage ceremony (and the meal or party that usually follows it)

9. bride – a woman on her wedding day, or just before or just after it

10. (bride)groom – a man on his wedding day, or just before or just after it

- The prince’s wedding ceremony will take place in the cathedral. Then the bride and the groom will be taken to the wedding reception in an open Rolls Royce.

11. honeymoon – a holiday taken by a couple who have just got married

- We couldn’t go to the Bahamas on honeymoon, but we felt sitting on the top of the world even in a campsite at the local lake.

12. divorce – the legal ending of a marriage; end your marriage legally

- Unfortunately, very many marriages end in a divorce in our country.

- She divorced her husband immediately when she learned he had a secret girlfriend.

- My friend and his wife got divorced at last, after long years of quarrel and disagreement.

If you absolutely enjoyed this English lesson, please share it with your friends and leave your comment below! Would be great to hear from you!

1. “Egghead” – a very studious person, intellectually gifted in the field of academics, a very intelligent person

- I think Jane will do well in her finals. She has always been a kind of egghead from elementary school all the way through college.

2. “Big cheese” – an important and influential person

- Do you know Peter? He’s a big cheese at the company, he may help you to get a good job there.

3. “Couch potato” - a very lazy person who watches too much TV

- My uncle is a couch potato, you never see him without the remote control in his hand.

4. “Tough cookie” – a very determined person, durable and robust person, a person who is difficult to deal with

- There is a tough cookie on the phone, he insists to talk to the manager, shall I put him through?

5. “Top banana” – leader, boss, the chief person in a group, the head of a project

- I don’t know when we’ll finish, ask Jack, he’s the top banana here.

6. “Bad apple” – troublemaker, criminal

- He’s a real bad apple. If I were you, I wouldn’t let my daughter go out with him.

7. “Sour grapes” – pretending to dislike something that you can’t have

- The losers say they don’t mind that they couldn’t win the cup, but I’m sure this is only sour grapes.

8. “Lemon law” – an American law that protects those who buy defective cars or other consumer goods

- Unfortunately, his new car had an engine defect, but he received a complete refund in accordance with the lemon law.

Among means surrounded by somebody/something in the middle of somebody/something, or included or happening in groups of things or people:

- We saw a house among the trees.

- They were walking among the crowds.

- I found the letter among a lot of old documents.

- Don’t worry, you’re among friends now.

- The boss was among the last to leave. 

Between usually means (being) in or (getting, etc.) into the space separating two or more points, objects, places, people, etc.

Or in the period of time that separates two days, years, events, etc. or it shows a connection or relationship between two things.

Or it can be used to show that several people or groups or actions are involved:

- There is a restaurant between the station and the post office.

- Peter was sitting between Joe and Mary.

- My glasses fell down between the desk and the wall.

- Mary’s job is somewhere between a secretary and a personal assistant.

- He flies between London and Paris twice a month.

- Between working in the office and driving a taxi in the evenings, he didn’t have much time for hobbies.

In general, when two things are concerned, between is used. When there are more than two things, we use between if something/somebody is between clearly separate or separable things or people, and among is preferred when something/somebody is in a group or mass of things or people which we do not see separately:

- Switzerland lies between Austria, Italy and France.

- Britain has certain domination among the European countries.

- My aunt’s house is between the forest, the river and the village.

- Her house is hidden among the trees.

Hope this help you to understand the difference between between vs among. Please share your questions with us, and we will answer them!

Choosing the right words and the right grammar can go a long way to removing some of the unpleasantness of the message we have to deliver. It can also help us to maintain a level of deference that we wish to show to superiors or clients in the normal course of business.

Using language diplomatically can be a challenge, even when speaking our mother tongue, but it is especially difficult when speaking a foreign language since we often lack the appropriate vocabulary, and a knowledge of alternative grammatical structures.

Consider the following sentence:

- I haven’t finished the report.

The speaker has done nothing here to soften the negative content of the message. A more diplomatic version might look something like this:

- I’m afraid I haven’t finished the report.

1. Softeners

‘I’m afraid’ is commonly referred to as a ‘softener’, a linguistic tool used to soften the tone of our content or convey politeness when we speak. Softeners often occur at the beginning of a sentence to prepare us for bad news: I’m afraid, so sorry, to be honest, unfortunately, with all respect

- To be honest, I think we need to rethink our marketing strategy.

- With all respect, I don’t agree with what you just said.

2. Modal Verbs

Modal verbs such as would, could, may or might are great for softening a request or giving a command:

- I want more time to finish this presentation.

- I could use more time to finish this presentation.

- It would be nice to have more time to finish this presentation.

- Hand me the telephone, please.

- Would you hand me the telephone, please?

- Could you hand me the telephone, please?

3. Rephrasing a Negative Sentence

Negative sentences can be rephrased in order to make them appear more positive. Our very first sentence can be made even more diplomatic in this way:

- I’m afraid I haven’t finished the report.

- I’m afraid I haven’t been able to finish the report yet.

Using ‘be able to’ here places emphasis on your attempt to finish the report rather than your failure to do so. It implies that you are still working to complete the task and that your inability to do so is perhaps due to circumstances beyond your control (such as a heavy workload etc.).

The addition of ‘yet’ at the end of the sentence reinforces the idea that you are still working on the report and it is almost completed, thus helping to reduce the negative impact of the sentence’s underlying content.

Negative sentences that are formed with can’t and won’t make the speaker sound particularly negative and unhelpful and can often be rephrased with be able to, or a similar expression:

- I can’t give you a better deal than that.

- I am not able to give you a better deal than that.

- I am unable to give you a better deal than that.

- I am not in a position to give you a better deal than that.

Similarly, affirmative sentences containing words with a negative meaning can be rephrased in order to soften the message and achieve a more indirect effect:

- I am unhappy with this agreement.

- I am not entirely happy with this agreement.

- I am not totally happy with this agreement.

Here the negative adjective unhappy is replaced with its positive counterpart happy, modified with an adverb such as entirely, totally or completely, and the sentence is changed to the negative form.

Of course, to achieve the best results we’ll need to combine these techniques to make sentences that contain several of these elements:

- I’m afraid I haven’t been able to finish the report yet, so I’m not in a position to send it to you right now. Could you give me a little more time, please?

Hopefully, when you put some of these practical tips to use, you’ll find that being diplomatic and polite with colleagues or clients in English is not as difficult as it seems. To see more examples and the second part of this post go to “Polite Expressions in English: Words, Phrases and Questions to be Kind”.

About author: Jeremy Bentley is professional native English teacher and a Greek to English translator. You can meet him and learn with him here at our online English language school.Image source

Provided by Kaplan

1. “Balance the books” - determine that accounts are in balance, bring the two sides into equilibrium, settle an account by paying what is due

- The accountant says he can’t balance the books till our last check clears.

2. “Bring home the bacon” – earn a salary, make money for your family

- When our parents died in an accident, and my sister and I remained alone, I had to leave college and bring home the bacon.

3. “Go Dutch” – share the cost of something

- When I wanted to settle the bill, she insisted on going Dutch and pay for her meal.

4. “Gravy train” – a source of easy money, a job that pays a lot with little work

- My brother took up a job in a beach restaurant and hoped to get on board the gravy train, but in fact he had to work more than in a factory.

5. “Nest egg” – savings, money kept in reserve

- Don’t worry about the job you lost. We have a little nest egg to live on until you find another.

6. “Cook the books” – cheat in accounting, manipulate financial records

- Nobody noticed that one of the managers was cooking the books until the company got totally bankrupt.

7. “Golden handshake” – a (large) sum of money paid to an employee when he/she leaves the firm

- Grandfather didn’t really want to retire too early, but he couldn’t resist the golden handshake that the company offered.

8. “Cheapskate” – somebody who doesn’t like to spend money

- We would need a new fridge, but my husband is such a cheapskate that I don’t think we’ll buy one before the other completely falls apart.

Good is usually an adjective (which modifies nouns) while well is an adverb (which modifies verbs, adjectives and other adverbs). Let’s see what I’m talking about in examples:

- There are two good restaurants in our street.

- We saw a very good film last night.

- My mobile phone is rather old, but it’s still good.

- Did you have a good time in Paris?

- She doesn’t play tennis, but she can swim well.

- The actors played very well at the theatre last night.

- You will be promoted if you do your work well.

- The reception was very well organized.

Good is often used after linking (or copular) verbs like be, seem, feel, taste, smell, sound or appear to express a state of being, condition or quality:

- I feel good.

- The soup tastes good.

- This idea sounds very good.

Well is rather used with action verbs:

- She plays the piano well.

- They sang very well at the concert last night.

- Thanks to my new glasses, I see well.
As an answer to the question ‘How are you?’, both good and well can be used, but their meaning is different:

- I’m well, I feel well = I’m in good health.

- I’m good, I feel good = I’m happy and everything is fine. (‘I’m good’ is very informal in this meaning and less frequently used)

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]]> http://www.myenglishteacher.eu/blog/good-vs-well-quick-and-easy-tips-to-understand-the-point/feed/ 0 http://www.myenglishteacher.eu/blog/8-idioms-about-happiness-that-make-you-happy-as-a-clam-infographic/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=8-idioms-about-happiness-that-make-you-happy-as-a-clam-infographic http://www.myenglishteacher.eu/blog/8-idioms-about-happiness-that-make-you-happy-as-a-clam-infographic/#comments Fri, 10 May 2013 17:11:58 +0000 Anastasia Koltai http://www.myenglishteacher.eu/blog/?p=3257 Continue reading →]]> We (English language learners) would like to speak English fluently. We learn English idioms and phrases, because they help us to become fluent in English faster.

Today you can start using these 8 idioms about happiness when you are happy and want to share it with others. You will also find the examples with explanation of these idioms under the infographic.

Provided by Kaplan

1. “Having a whale of a time” - have a very good time, have an exciting or fun time

- “How was your birthday party?”
- “Oh great, there were a lot of friends, we were playing games and dancing, we really had a whale of a time.”

2. “On cloud nine” - very happy, cheerful

- I was very afraid of the history exam, and when I managed to pass it, I was on cloud nine, I invited all my friends to a drink in the local pub.

3. “Tickled pink” - very much pleased or entertained

- I suggest picking some flowers for your girlfriend. I’m sure she’ll be tickled pink and she won’t refuse your proposal.

4. “On top of the world” - feeling wonderful, glorious, ecstatic

- Since he was promoted to the position he had desired for ages, he feels glorious, he’s sitting on top of the world.

5. “Happy as a clam” - very happy and comfortable

- When her parents left for holiday, she was happy as a clam staying alone in the house.

6. “Buzzing” - excited for something that’s going to happen

- I’m buzzing for the holidays. Imagine, we’re going on a diving trip in Greece.

7. “Over the moon” - extremely pleased and happy

- Do you remember how happy we were when we first stayed out for a night? We were over the moon.

8. “In seventh heaven” - in a very happy state

- Real happiness is when you work for it. I’m sure you’ll be in seventh heaven when you get your first salary and buy a scooter.

Do you know other idioms? Share them with us!

The important difference between listen and hear is that listening is deliberate, and hearing is not. Hear means that sounds come into your ears whether you want it or not, while listen means that you consciously pay attention to what you hear, that is you want to hear something:

- Can you hear the birds singing in the garden?

- I’m listening, but I can’t hear anything.

- We heard a terrible noise when the cars crashed in front of our house.

- Listen, some fine jazz music is played in the neighbour’s flat.

- Have you heard the news? Peter has married a millionaire’s daughter.

- Turn on the radio, please. I’d like to listen to the news.

When we use listen with an object, we say listen + to + object:

- He listens to the news on the radio every morning.

- Everybody listened carefully to the old man’s story.

- You’ll get in trouble if you don’t listen to your teacher.

We may also use hear when we listen to somebody or something attentively or officially (usually in the past), but there is no emphasis on the action of listening, that is the fact that we heard it or the contents of what we heard is important and not the action:

- I heard a very interesting speech on the radio last night.

- We heard David Bowie live when we were in London.

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